You might think that with such large numbers of people disconnected from their Jewish roots, we could at least count on Orthodox kids to stay religious. But instead, we see so many young adults from Orthodox families leaving Orthodoxy after entering college.

Why do so many people go "off the derech" in college? Is there a part of college orientation which involves dancing puppets singing about the wonders of not being Jewish? If this were indeed the case, then the answer would be obvious. However, to the best of my knowledge, no college has GOY 101 (Singing Missionaries in the 21st Century) as a core requirement. So we are left with our original question.

We can find a clue in the Tanach. If you look just about anywhere in the Tanach, you will see something astounding: The name of G-d is on everyone's lips. Look in Meggilat Ruth (which is read on Shavuot). Naomi blesses Ruth and Orpah that "may G-d deal kindly with you." A few lines later, she tells them that "G-d's hand is against me." She was in fact mistaken, but look at how she refers to G-d! Is she ashamed to talk about G-d in front of Moabites? After all, she shouldn't make value judgements about other people's religions! But she is perfectly willing to talk about G-d in an everyday, almost offhand manner.

The reason for this is simple: To her, the fact that she was suffering was obviously because G-d was set against her. In her mind, that was the way the world worked! She recognized innately that any good or bad fortune is really an act of G-d. Why did she recognize this? Because everyone did. The culture in which she was raised had taught her that G-d is intimately involved in all aspects of life.

What about the culture in which we are raised? Well, we are taught that G-d expects certain things of us. He doesn't want us to watch television on our day off, and He would absolutely go ballistic if we were to eat shellfish. And we know what happens if we don't follow the rules! Every Jew knows those words, intrinsic to our religion- "mi bamayim umi ba-aish..." If we don't jump through the proper hoops, G-d gets out His celestial dartboard and picks a fate for us. Fire, water, sword, famine, pestilence- any or all of these could be heading your way if you're on G-d's naughty list come Tishrei.

So why do so many Orthodox Jews become non-religious in college, when they enter an environment where these restrictions are no longer being imposed on them by social and peer pressure? Hmmmmmmm. Perhaps this example conversation betrween an Orthodox freshman and a non-Jewish classmate will shed some light on the problem:

Sruly: Hi, I'm Sruly. What's your name?

Keith: Keith. By the way, do you want some of these delicious Bacon Bits I'm eating? {munches Bacon Bits}

Sruly: Thanks, but I think G-d would smite me if I ate those.

Keith: Don't be silly. I've been eating them for years and G-d hasn't said a word about it.

Sruly: But, you see, I'm Jewish...

Keith: Really? My mother's aunt's dog is Jewish, and he eats Bacon Bits...

Sruly: Well, I guess just one won't hurt...

{At this point Sruly is swept away by a hail of brimstone}

Of course, this is not very realistic. In reality, Sruly would not be swept away by a hail of brimstone, and would probably go on to do much worse things, like eating Bacon Bits while talking to a girl. Eventually, he would graduate college with a B.A. in Not Being Jewish, and would one day become CEO of Bacon Bits, Inc., which is not a job for a nice Jewish boy.

So why do Jews go off the derech in college? Because they have never been shown "the derech!" As far as they are concerned, Judaism consists of a set of demands about what can and (mainly) what can't be done. The values which are nearest to their hearts are not Jewish values, but rather the often contrary values of the society in which they live.

The values of instant gratification, moral relativity (i.e. that each person can define his own morals), the idea that religion is "outdated," and the sense that nothing is sacred or holy are all strongly entrenched in the culture around us. These ideas gain legitimacy and seep in, because we hold the society around us in high regard. We have good reason to- it has brought us such wonders as polyester, skyscrapers, space shuttles, microchips and potato chips. We expect that it also has much to say about the theological secrets of the universe. What it has given us is a theological version of the scientific method: moral relativity- essentially treating each hypothetical moral system with equal respect. And this is the downfall of every moral system. Western society says, "We can't choose"- and what they get is Nothing. No right or wrong, unless perhaps a moral truth can be "proven" scientifically. But even these scientific morals are weak, because of the nature of moral relativity, and can be replaced within a few years' time. This is called "progress."

We should have some pride in our morally absolute heritage, and should realize and internalize that there is such a thing as an absolute right and wrong. The second step is living up to that, by doing what is right and shunning what is wrong.

"Who is the man who desires life? .... Turn from evil and do good, seek peace and pursue it." (Tehillim 34:13,15)

With the disconnect between mitzvos and morality, G-d becomes a being who takes pleasure in choosing punishments for those who can't follow His obscure demands, instead of the benevolent Creator who wants us to be good and honest people, and who showers kindness on His creation. No more is the Torah seen as "darchei noam"- all the pleasure and goodness is taken out of the service of G-d.

No wonder we don't refer to G-d in the course of everyday conversation anymore. In our minds, G-d has nothing to do with our everyday life. We have carefully sectioned off religion from our "real life." Religion is external to us, a set of requirements which we must meet before we can get back to what we're really interested in. The gemara records how, "In earlier days, people would bring their harvest in through the main entrance of the house so that it was clearly obligated in the mitzvah of maaser. Nowadays, people bring it in through balconies and skylights so as to avoid the obligation of maaser." What was the difference between the earlier days and the later days? The key may be that "earlier days" refers to a time before the galut, and "nowadays", when the gemara was written, was during the galut. The immersion in Babylonian and Roman culture had already had the effect that people were no longer in tune with the spirit of the mitzvos, and had now started to view them as obligations to be discharged, instead of opportunities to approach G-d.

The Torah is meant to apply in any situation that comes up in our lives, whether by following the letter of the law, or the spirit. If we learn the Torah, we will see that it is replete with moral commands. "Do not oppress the stranger... You shall not oppress any widow or orphan..." "Do not place a stumbling block before the blind." "You shall have just weights and measures." The prophets also frequently admonish the people that G-d does not desire an empty service of merely fulfilling the requirements of the mitzvot, if it is not accompanied by goodness and righteousness. The gemara also, while it splits hairs about the details of the mitzvot, is certainly not lacking in teachings about morality. If someone renegs on an agreement that was final, but not technically binding, he is cursed that "He who collected payment from the generation of the flood, from Sodom and Amorah, from Pharaoh and the Egyptians, etc., will collect payment from one who does not uphold his word."

We are supposed to imitate G-d, who protects orphans and widows. "As He is merciful, so you should be merciful, as He does kindness, so should you do kindness..." Of course, at this point I must apply the disclaimer that mitzvos and their involved details are certainly important. But they must be accompanied by a desire to approach G-d by following His laws, because that is the whole point.

"Who is such a great nation who has G-d close to it, as is the L-RD our G-d, whenever we call to Him? And who is such a great nation that has righteous statutes and laws, as is this entire Torah that I place before you today?" (Devarim 4:7-8)

Chag Sameiach.

(Thanks go to Rabbi Dovid Orlofsky for the funny part, and for many of the ideas included here. Thanks also go to Rabbi Reuven Taragin for the main theme.)